Henry
Thomas Kellam
We are gathered this afternoon to bear witness to our faith in the resurrection, the resurrection of all who are buried in Jesus Christ the Lord and the resurrection of Henry Thomas Kellam. Tommy died on Saturday after suffering with Alzheimer’s for many years. He was 72.
Tommy was a native of Cape Charles, on the eastern shore of Virginia.
Although he spent most of his adult life in Richmond, he never wavered in
his love of the sea and the land beyond the bay. After graduating from high school he headed for Hamden-Sydney
College and the ministry. Instead
he went to work for Sears and a long career in sales.
Tommy was a Theta Chi at Hamden-Sydney, and at fraternity-sorority dance
he met a girl Longwood College from Danville, Virginia.
Tommy and Anne Oakley were married in the summer of 1952.
They enjoyed 42 years of marriage together, before Anne’s death in
1994. They had two sons, Howard and
Steve.
Tommy and Anne lived for a time in the Hampton Roads area before settling
in Richmond in 1959. They moved to
Bon Air, living first on Pulliam Street before purchasing their home on Jimmy
Winters in 1966. There they built a
home and their family, with Anne teaching and Tommy working in sales first with
Atlantic Electric and then GTE.
Tommy was a supportive and present parent with his boys during their
formative years, leading them through sports and scouts and various youth and
school activities. He joined Anne when she started leading summer trips for
school children to. After the boys
were grown, he and Anne continued to travel.
While the boys were young the family camped a lot, in a trailer Tommy
bought. Often the family would stay for extended periods at the beach in the
summers, with Tommy commuting to work.
Tommy truly was a “people person”, and the two major arenas for his
involvement with people were his church and the community.
A lifelong Presbyterian, Tommy was an elder in the Bon Air Presbyterian
Church, his home for 36 years. Anne and Tommy were involved just about every
area of the church’s life. They started a couples club.
Tommy hosted an annual oyster roast for the men of the church – until
the women wanted to share in the fun, and so they were invited along, too. Tommy
cooked a monthly men’s breakfast for a generation.
He was a long-time usher captain. He led a Wednesday evening cooking
team. He hosted the homeless through CARITAS.
He coordinated the church’s periodic blood drives. Whenever the church gathered for mission or fellowship or
worship, Tommy was here.
Tommy and Anne were high school youth group advisors. One of the now grown up kids from that group, Laura Finch, wrote me this week about the impact she felt Tommy and Anne had on their faith development. She wrote,
“He was the Silver Fox, our surrogate father and confidante. We had a very close-knit youth group in the late 70s and early 80s. Even though we went to different high schools we got to be good friends and some of us have stayed in touch. Mr. and Mrs. Kellam were a great pair for our group. Mr. Kellam was puckish, full of mischief , whereas Anne was more grounded and probably kept Tommy from getting all of us into trouble! I remember going to progressive dinners, Camp Hanover retreats, and I am sure at some point some religious activities. They were sensible and available. Several of us had crushes on each other (which changed from week to week) and they stayed above the teenaged hormonal fray ignoring us when they needed to and listening at other times. Being the parents of two boys we couldn't pull anything over on them. He was sweet, funny and full of laughter, but he let us know if we crossed the line. Strangely enough I keep remembering that Tommy used to unload bananas for one of his jobs when he was young and the bananas had tarantulas in them. Funny what you remember. I think he was trying to tell us some message about work or maybe he was pulling my leg. Hard to tell.”
Tommy was also active in the community, building relationships and
reaching out to the unfortunate, troubled, and outcast. He was an early leader
in the FISH cooperative ministry. He
help found a halfway house for alcoholic women, and for years carried them
leftover food from church events. He
was a tireless worker for the Virginia Blood Services Blood Bank.
He faithfully visited in nursing homes.
This wiry man had hidden energy stores that didn’t stop!
A remarkable chapter of Tommy’s life were his later years.
He resisted the limitations imposed on him by his encroaching dementia.
When he could no longer drive to his appointed rounds, he would walk. And
his friends in the church kept him going in
their cars, too, driving him, picking him up, dropping him off.
It was a sad day for his friends, as well as for Tommy, when he just
couldn’t keep at it anymore, and when for his safety and others, he had to
leave his home and move to Manor House at Belgrade.
Tommy is survived by his sister Harryette Thomas; his son Howard and his
wife Tracy and their son Dustin; and by his son Steven, and his wife Sherri and
their children Isabelle and Lauren; and by countless friends and recipients of
his care and concern.
Having gathered for our mutual support and concern, and to hear the
witness of the scriptures, let us worship God.